Destinies Lost - A Life Without My Son?by Sandy Arena on 02/03/16
I once asked my then 10-year-old son Caleb the question,"How do you know I love you?" And he answered me without blinking an eye, "Because you didn't abort me." As I gazed lovingly and adoringly at my son after hearing him say this and trying to visualize a world without him, you can imagine how my heart hurt. As a woman who has aborted, his words cut deeply as truth in my broken heart as the reality of what he so innocently said unfolded.
I just received a novel yesterday written by my friend Renee Maimone which she worked on for many years. I have not read it yet, as I just received it, but she wrote the following to me in a letter included with the book:
"When a life is taken before one's time, things change. God will never reduce your significance by creating another you, therefore your blueprint will no longer interact with another. The loss is now suffered by those remaining. This includes ordained spouses."
And likewise, there is a song I wrote for Arise Sweet Sarah where our character "Sarah" sings of the loss of her unborn and the devastating choice she made to abort. The song is called "Destinies Lost", and it is about taking what was God's and what could have been through the choice of abortion.
There is so much wrong with abortion and cutting the life of a human being short because of fear, uncertainty, selfishness and career goals. Abortion robs the world of so much including the dignity of the woman who partakes, and also robs the world of a preordained destiny with a plan and a purpose. No, I can't imagine a world without Caleb. And worse as a mother, because of abortion, I am left to imagine a world that includes those I aborted and what could have been. I am also left to process and silently deal with the deep sorrow that comes with such imaginings.
Abortion was set before me because of the potential success I would have in life attending college. For the full details, you need to watch my film Arise Sweet Sarah. I must ask those who advocate for the "progress", "advancement" and "empowerment" of women to choose abortion in order to pursue "success" this question: If I placed before you, your BORN child's life or the continuation of your career, which would you choose? I guarantee it would be your child. I hope it would be your child.
So why then is it okay to snuff out that life while that child is forming in your womb? What is the difference? And furthermore, why must the success of a woman to pursue a career and motherhood be mutually exclusive?
It is not, and it is NOT progressive or empowering or right to advocate for a young woman who may find herself unexpectedly pregnant to choose one or the other.
Thank you Renee for writing your novel and putting these truths before the world. And to my fellow women? Once a life has been created inside of you, you need to embrace what is exclusively given to you by God as the privilege to carry and birth that life - whether you are able to parent or not (because trust me there are plenty who will parent for you and will be honored to bring that legacy forward).
The world's blueprint will forever be changed if you decide to take what is God's and the destiny that is in motion with abortion, and like me, you will suffer deep, indescribable loss. Don't ever be the woman who must look into her son's eyes and hear those words come forth from his mouth. You can choose life and legacy and years from now will be a stronger and more progressive and empowered woman for it.
My son just turned 14 the other day and he continues to "wow" me in ten million ways. I am enthralled by him.